Monday, March 26, 2007
Physics
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him.
"Why do we have to learn this stuff?" one young man blurted out.
"To save lives," the professor responded before continuing the lecture.
A few minutes later the student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?"
The professor stared at the student for a long time without saying a word. Finally the professor continued.
"Physics saves lives," he said, "because it keeps certain people out of medical school."
The Worst Disease
A woman was very despondent over not having sex in quite some time. She was becoming agitated and worried that she might not ever find a new mate. In hopes of finding a solution to her problem, she decided to go see a Chinese doctor named Dr. Chang (a sex therapist) to see if he could help her.
When she arrived to his office, she told him her symptoms and he said, "Take off all your crothes and you crawl real real fass away from me on the froor".
She crawled to the other side of the room, and Dr. Chang said, "Now... you crawl real fass back to me", and she did.
Dr. Chang shook his head and said, "You haf read bad case of Zachary Disease... worse I ever see! That is why you have sex probrem".
The woman was completely confused and asked Dr. Chang to explain exactly what Zachary Disease was and he replied "Zachary Disease. That when your face rook ZACHARY rike your ass!"
The Older and Smarter Construction Worker
A young man at this construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone based on his strength. He especially made fun of one of the older workman. After several minutes, the older worker had enough.
"Why don't you put your money where you mouth is?" he said. "I'll bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to the other building that you won't be able to wheel back."
"You're on, old man," the young man replied. "Let's see what you've got."
The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then nodding to the young man, he said with a smile, "All right. Get in."
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him.
"Why do we have to learn this stuff?" one young man blurted out.
"To save lives," the professor responded before continuing the lecture.
A few minutes later the student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?"
The professor stared at the student for a long time without saying a word. Finally the professor continued.
"Physics saves lives," he said, "because it keeps certain people out of medical school."
The Worst Disease
A woman was very despondent over not having sex in quite some time. She was becoming agitated and worried that she might not ever find a new mate. In hopes of finding a solution to her problem, she decided to go see a Chinese doctor named Dr. Chang (a sex therapist) to see if he could help her.
When she arrived to his office, she told him her symptoms and he said, "Take off all your crothes and you crawl real real fass away from me on the froor".
She crawled to the other side of the room, and Dr. Chang said, "Now... you crawl real fass back to me", and she did.
Dr. Chang shook his head and said, "You haf read bad case of Zachary Disease... worse I ever see! That is why you have sex probrem".
The woman was completely confused and asked Dr. Chang to explain exactly what Zachary Disease was and he replied "Zachary Disease. That when your face rook ZACHARY rike your ass!"
The Older and Smarter Construction Worker
A young man at this construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone based on his strength. He especially made fun of one of the older workman. After several minutes, the older worker had enough.
"Why don't you put your money where you mouth is?" he said. "I'll bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to the other building that you won't be able to wheel back."
"You're on, old man," the young man replied. "Let's see what you've got."
The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then nodding to the young man, he said with a smile, "All right. Get in."
posted by Ivan at 9:49 PM
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